Hero
by Kkornelia
Summary: Kidnapped. Haunted, scared and alone in the hands of those whom killed her father, Flay breaksdown inside the Vesalius only to find strength again in the most unlikely person. Yzak. -Note: no romance.
1. Trembling Hands

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gundam Seed and Gundam Seed Destiny.

**A/N:** Ah. Everyone seems to have their own version. It is because this is the only thing we have. No romance. Eh… I try.

Comments, suggestions, grammar correction and constructive criticisms are also loved. Tnx.

**Rated – T **for language and themes.

" " for speech  
_Italic for flashbacks, thoughts, and opinions._

**Hero: Chapter 1: Trembling Hands**

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Vice Foreign Minister of Atlantic Federation, George Allster, had always been a busy man. He was one of those single parents whose job forces him to be rarely home for his family. Working the whole day, traveling the next, and rarely having any breaks; this was one of those perks that came with being a high ranking official in the government.

In order to support his family, for him, this was one those sacrifices, which he just had to do due to his unconditional love for his daughter, his most precious.

Flay, his daughter, happens to be the only family he has left after his wife had passed away. Instantly, after the horrible incident, Flay has become the world to him and him to her.

Thus, it has always pained him for having to leave her home alone mostly everyday, but Flay being a reasonable daughter never complained it to be unfair. All right, maybe she did whine about it a couple of few times. After all, he was her father and she, his only daughter. Would it not be right for them to spend more time together then him always leaving her alone for work?

But the time came when Flay finally came to realize- what he was doing has been for the benefit of them both. Thus, though limited, patiently, she waits for the phone call he makes everyday.

So when Flay had heard the news about her father coming home to see her after a long business trip, the girl just could not help but be excited about being able see him again.

As to every child who loves their parent, she had missed him very much.

Quickly, after lunch, Flay arrived to her room, digging through her wardrobe with giddy. The broach, hair pins, dress, jewelry, and shoes, every little thing that caught her eyes had nearly been bought for her by the loving George Allster, and she had walked around in each several times debating which one to wear.

A signified daddy's girl, Flay Allster has taken upon herself to dress up for her father and look good for him in front of his colleagues to show off and be proud of.

Flay smiled approvingly as she walked around in a little circle, trying to search for any flaw on her dress in the three-way mirror while smoothing the fabric that felt and fit wonderful against her skin.

Seeing nothing but perfection, Flay nodded to herself, and quickly took off with poise in search for George Allster.

Flay had a smile on her face as she walked down the corridors. Occasionally, she reached up and adjusted the frail blue ribbon on her hair.

"…just because of those artificial genes, they act and think they are far superior to us Naturals." A man was saying. Flay froze in mid step and looked around. The voices were coming from the next room, and she paused in front of the door.

"They are monsters. There is nothing natural about them."

"Coordinators and their colonies hovering above us Naturals from space, acting like Gods!"

"Hmph. What else should we expect from those Coordinators?"

Slowly, Flay pushed the wooden door open. Inside the room where five adult males in business attire entering through their front door, one happens to be her dad. Flay lit up at the sight of him at the same time George Allster brightened up at the sight of her. He dropped his suitcase and smiled warmly.

"Ah. Here is my little princess." He smiled, held out his arms, expecting her to run into his loving embrace. He too had missed her so much.

Flay was only too happy to comply and run towards him. She rushed from five meters to seven; from seven to thirteen; and inexplicable, the distance continued to grow farther. "Daddy!" Flay cried, holding out an arm, unable to understand why they were suddenly drifting apart.

Slowly…

In the cold, deep, darkness of the empty space.

The image of her father was soon replaced by an image of a shuttle, followed by an explosion that wiped everything into complete nothingness right before her very eyes.

Allster manor, as to this day, will never brighten up ever again.

00000

Smokey gray eyes slowly flew open. She blinked once, twice as the room's features came into focus. Flay breathed heavily as tears began to roll down her cheeks at the painful reality.

Her father, the one she held closest to her heart, the only family she has left, was now gone. Never again will she be able to hear his voice. Never again would she see his smiling face. Never again would she able to hold him.

_Daddy… _Flay curved into a ball, grabbing hold of anything she could get her hands on. Her heart took a painful drop. She felt heavy and weak that she could not help but feel an awful pain in her stomach. Suddenly, she felt like wanting to vomit.

"Ah. So you are awake."

_Daddy's voice._

_It couldn't be… _

Flay's eyes shot open so deliberately fast that it hurt. It was at that moment did she realize she was grabbing hold on white sheets, laying on bed inside an unfamiliar room, fully clothed, of course, in earth alliance uniform.

Slowly, she scanned the room, trailing to where she had heard her father's voice from.

From where she lay, Flay decided to pull herself up into a sitting position when she came face to face with a man wearing a mask, sitting on a chair across from her, not too far away.

Calmly, he was staring at her. Flay knew despite the mask covering half of his face.

The man had this creepy smirk formed on his lips, which has stricken immediate fear into her very core, but what had caught her attention most was the white uniform he wore where ZAFT's emblem was clearly visible on either side of the upper sleeve of the uniform.

_The enemy!_

Flay snapped. Instincts made her scrambled quickly in search for anything that could protect her from him. In the nearest drawer, she managed to pull out a gun. And with trembling hands, quickly aimed it at the man, who made not a single move to stop her.

Despite the fact that he could have a bullet inside his head any minute, the guy wearing a mask was surprisingly calm. Was it the fact she was obviously inexperience and had never actually shot a man before? Or could it be that he was simply unafraid of death? Flay couldn't have cared less.

"There is no need to be hasty, my dear. I have no intentions of hurting you."

That voice. There was no mistaking it. The tone of this man's voice sounds so much like her father's that it disgusted her!

Just by hearing this man speak never fails to remind her so much of her beloved father. It was utterly painful; a direct jab into her heart, remembering how the shuttle he was on exploded in front of her. Unable to stop the hot tears that have been forming in her eyes, Flay held onto the gun tighter.

Still with trembling hands, half scared- half daring, "T- Take me to…. the archangel!" Flay demanded. She was either stupid or really determined to be asking something, which she already knew was impossible. "I- I beg of you…"

Commander Rau Le Creuset, though unnoticeable behind his mask, raised a curios eyebrow. _Who is this girl? What is her connection to that legged ship? Why had he found her wondering around Josh-A? Could she be the key that he has been searching for?_ Le Creuset smirked at his luck. It was a just matter of time and the simplicity of playing his cards right.

Deciding not to move from his place, "I'm afraid that is not possible." He answered the frantic girl calmly. He was trying not to startle her, but strangely enough, she kept fidgeting every time he spoke.

Slowly, Flay made her way across the room with caution, hoping to reach the door with gun still pointed at the man's head, though partially impossible to be done, all Flay could think of was- wanting to get out of there; out to where ever; just away from this place; away from this man!

However, before she could have reached it, as of on cue, the only exit on the room slid open when another ZAFT military solider entered the room.

"Commander, you wanted t-….." A male about her age entered before stopping on his tracks. His brow furrowed. The look he gave was a mixture of anger and disbelief at the scene taking place in front of him.

_Another one of these filthy coordinators!_

Frantically, "Don't- don't step any closer or I'll shoot!" Flay threatened, cautiously circling the room. Eyes on the younger ZAFT soldier; trembling gun aimed at the ZAFT commander.

Watching Flay trembling in fear, "My dear, there is no need to be afraid." The ZAFT commander stood up from his chair and took a step closer towards Flay, which she took a step back.

"I- said stay back!" Flay yelled.

_How could something so filthy have the same voice as her father?_

"It's all right. Calm down."

_Daddy's voice! _

"Shut up!" Flay shook her head.

_It's her daddy's voice!_

_NO! IT'S NOT! HER FATHER IS DEAD!_

_Then whose voice is this?_

"_SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"_

Unable to stand it no longer, "You have no right!" She yelled at him. Impulsively, Flay rashly pulled the trigger, aiming right for the ZAFT Commander's head. Unlike now, perhaps he would shut up when his dead. Her hopes were dashed, however, when the bullet had missed by approximately six inches from the man's head.

Furthermore, what she had done has proven to be a big mistake, Flay soon found out, when the other soldier took this opportunity to lunge at her.

When Flay tried to escape, she felt her self being yanked back and then forward again, thrown by the aggressive ZAFT solider.

He was able to catch her wrist with little effort and twisting it just enough to cause her mild pain to loosen the gun that she felt being pried away from her fist just as she felt her body being pushed back, and then slammed against a solid wall with the young man in front of her, pressing a blade to her throat.

That was when she finally woke up and fear broke in. She had come face to face with the enemy! His face was so close that all she took notice was the large horrible red ugly scar against his pale skin and the blade, which was so close to slashing her throat.

_One false move…_ Flay breathed hard…. _And it would be the end of her._

All of the sudden, in Flay's eyes, everything seems to be running in slow motion. _Frightening guy with an ugly scar holding knife so close to her throat. Knife so close to her throat… knife in her throat…. Scar… knife… _She could no longer think clearly.

Deep breathing. Inhale. Exhale. She could hear nothing else, but her own breathing echoing through her ears.

What had happened next, Flay was not sure because the guy with the scar had roughly released her. Ordered by his superior, perhaps, because he looked angry, pissed beyond belief, and definitely intimidating. He threw a hard glare at her direction with those piercing blue eyes of his full of disgusts before following his Commander out from the room, leaving her alone.

The moment the two ZAFT soldiers had left.

Catatonic, Flay closed her eyes. Suddenly losing her all strength, her legs gave in, and her back slid down, accordingly, against the solid wall behind her until she was sitting on the cold steel floor, completely shaken. The painful truth was finally sinking in.

She was now in inside enemy territory, taken as a prisoner. No longer was she inside the Archangel. No longer was Kira there to protect her. Her father's gone. Sai would no longer take her back. Even Miriallia disapproves of her. And now, she was alone, completely helpless, in the mercy of those who killed her father.

_What have she ever done to deserve all of these?_

Doing the only thing she could do. She cried.


	2. Prisoner

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gundam Seed and Gundam Seed Destiny.

**A/N: **Corrections and Criticisms would likely be appreciated.

**To BlitzUlitmate – **thanks, I really appreciate the review. Although I wish there would be more Yzak and Flay stories like this as well… I don't think I'll be writing anything similar to this anytime soon. I wish others would though.

" " for speech  
_Italic_ for flashbacks, thoughts, and opinions.

**Hero: Chapter 2: "Prisoner"**

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_Thrice!_

Thrice was the number of times he, Yzak Joule, had caught _that girl_ pointing a gun at Commander Le Creuset since the day she was brought aboard the ship.

Yzak Joule growled low on his throat, roughly making his way to his quarter for some much needed rest. He had always made it a policy not to question his superiors, _but this… this was just doting beyond all reason._

_What on PLANTS was the Commander thinking?_

Capturing an OMNI officer; bring her abroad the ship; taking her to his room; unbothered to disarm her; and not locking her up in a cellar where all prisoners of war belong! And to even say that Flay Allster is a prisoner inside the Vesalius is a complete understatement because, apparently, she is not treated like one!

First of all, the Commander has given her a cabin equipped with her own private bathroom, instead of locking her up in the basement. And a nineteen square meter room, fully furnished with no bars is hardly considered a cellar.

Second, as ordered by the Commander, the prisoner's meals are to be _specially_ delivered to her room everyday. In spite the fact, she never consumes them. _Talk about a complete waste of resources!_

And last, the prisoner was required to accompany Commander Le Crueset during the man's important expeditions in or out of the Vesalius to discuss military campaigns!

In conclusion, _that woman_ was being treated far better than any other soldiers in the military. Even he, Yzak Joule, an Elite Red Coat ZAFT soldier, pilot of the GAT-X102 Duel, and son of Ezalia Joule, head of the Defense Committee— is not treated with such special care! Not that he would want to be treated like some fragile plastic doll anyway.

Point is. Yzak was furious.

"If _that girl_ is a prisoner, shouldn't she be treated like one…?"

What annoyed him the most was why on PLANTS is _that girl_ so important to the Commander, which has resulted in ZAFT's mysterious and irrelevant hospitable treatment to a Prisoner of War.

What's worst, when Yzak had issued this concern to the said Commander, the man replied, speaking about a bunch of doors and keys and _shit_.

After expressing his great distaste, Yzak continued to walk, now purposely, as he made his way the deserted corridor following the path back to his quarter, when he halted, hearing sounds of tray and bowls _crash _in the next room.

Yzak snarled, coming face to face with a particular door- Her door. Why was he not surprise that _that girl_ was behind this racket?

Faintly, by standing there, he could make out unfathomable sounds, like nothing he has ever heard of. It was a string of rattling, guttural noises that was becoming demanding in its refrain. It only occurred to him very late that the sound was nothing more than a various assortments of sobs and whimpers.

Yzak rolled his eyes in annoyance.

_That girl_ is crying _AGAIN?_ For heaven's sake, they are at war here! _That girl_ has done nothing but shed tears ever since she was brought aboard this ship!

Is _that girl_ even a soldier? Because she is by far the most pathetic soldier he has ever come across. How _that girl_ even became one is beyond him!

What does she expect ZAFT to do? Set her free like this _stupid_ war does not exist? The universe, unfortunately, does not work that way. The mafia won't spare anyone just because that person turned out to be gorgeous. Heroes are not always noble. Seeking goodness in everyone may get you killed. Abandon love. Forget about clichés. This is reality. And reality is- they are soldiers fighting a war!

She is lucky enough to be alive while most Earth Forces would not even make it pass ZAFT territory with their life attached.

And with that, Yzak Joule tore his gaze away, acting like he never even noticed. And he strode off before anyone would mistakenly accuse him of feeling sympathetic to the Natural prisoner for standing in front of her doorway.

00000

Carefully, she opened her blue-grays that have reddened by tears.

Flay looked up at the shadowy ceiling, at nothing in particular. To her left, she could still clearly smell the distinct scent of soup, potato and other mount food spilled over her floor, and was unbothered by it. Less than twenty-four hours ago, she had been laying in the dark at the corner of the bed, waiting… and waiting for everything to just disappear, for all of her senses, mind and body to engross in total darkness. It seemed a life time away.

She felt hallow.

"_You are already living on borrowed time, aren't you, Flay Allster?"_

In her head, through her ears, Flay's thoughts drifted to Commander Le Creuset and to what he had said the other day. His words were echoing, haunting her slowly, as if she was listening to him say them for the first time. Word per word. Pause after pause. Inexplicable, his voice a held some power over her, which she could not seem to get rid off.

"_Back in Alaska, you would have been equally dead if I had shot you or just let you run off. And you would die within moments if you were to shoot me right now… the soldiers would hear, Or if you didn't want them to finish you off, I suppose you could always point the gun at yourself and pull the trigger. I assume the gun is loaded." _

Flay shuddered and felt another tear slide halfway down her cheek, somehow still hearing the sound of her father in some of the man's tones.

"_On the battlefield, life is cheap. It's lost in an instant. And yet, people still fight for their country… or for justice. But you're not really cut out for that sort of thing, you may be wearing a military uniform, but you're no soldier. Am I wrong?"_

Flay twinge at the memory mocking her at her inability to function and do what she wants done. He saw right through her, her weakness clearly exposed by him. She had been given the opportunity to take his life right there, yet she could not find, with all her pent-up hate and anger, the will to shoot him. She felt useless and extremely vulnerable.

What was going to happen now?

Flay pulled the blanket over her head; her thoughts now drifting to the way the masked Commander would talk to her one-on-one during his frequent _unwelcome_ visits. He would ask her who she was. He would share his view of- how he would like nothing but to put an end to this meaningless war.

Why had Commander Le Creuset told her? Had he actually cared about her at all? Or had he have plans for her and felt obligated to do so?

And then, she thought about the protection the Commander willingly gave her without cause and ordered the rest of the ZAFT crew to do the same, and Flay's resentment swelled in darkness. She did not need anyone's pity just like she did not need Kira's.

Despite the majority of the ship's crew hospitality façade towards her, she knew those were all fake. After receiving sardonic side glances and overhearing murmurs on every corners of the ship, Flay has been completely aware of what those _disgusting_ Coordinators talk about her behind her back anyway. So what was the use pretending?

In a place where everything's run entirely by Coordinators, a Natural such as herself will always be the odd one in the bunch.

Often, they would theorize what a terrified, impotent, Natural girl like Flay Allster could possibly offer in exchange for the Commander's protection. Thus, behind her back, she was called many names; each one being worst than the previous one.

But what do they know?

Commander Le Creuset promised he would protect her. He would not hurt her. He would not even spill a single drop of her blood. He would tell her over and over that no physical harm would be inflicted upon her so long as he was there. And in return, he had asked for nothing.

Completely nothing.

Why would the Commander do such a thing?

The truth irked Flay because she had no idea. She was as clueless as the rest of those Coordinators, and she too was too fearful to find out.

It was not until several long seconds had passed when she realized she had already heard the pneumatic hiss of the door opening. Commander Le Creuset stood gracefully on her doorway, his height as intimidating as the crisp white uniform. His mask glinting malevolently that made Flay draws back in fear, "Go away! Just leave me alone." Flay drawled. In spite of their frequent meetings, she has never gotten used to his presence.

She was an OMNI officer. He ZAFT's. Coordinators killed her father. And in her eyes, Commander Rau Le Creuset will always be an enemy.

"A battle is about to begin. Would you like to observe?" He asked casually with the barest hint of a smile playing on his face.

At her teetering mental condition, Flay threw her gaze away from the light source. The prospect of him keeping her safe for no apparent reason was daunting.

There are all sorts of wounds, not just one, and there are so many ways to breach them.


	3. Lowest Point

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gundam Seed and Gundam Seed Destiny.

**A/N:** Big thanks to those who took the time to review. I am aware that this may not be the most exciting fanfiction around, but I'm glad there are people still willing to read it.

" " for speech  
_Italic_ for flashbacks, thoughts, and opinions.

**Hero: Chapter 3: "Lowest Point"**

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_ALERT! ALERT!_

The moment Flay followed Commander Le Creuset out from her quarter, the ship's status had been shifted to: _Condition red!_ Red lights were flashing all over. Everyone on-board: soldiers, crews, and staffs were running in all direction, hastening to their dignified posts.

Having been hit, in the middle of an ongoing battle, the Vesalius shook roughly.

"Where is the Commander?" At the bridge, one yelled.

"Captain, the ship's central armor has been lowered by 15 percent!" Another informed.

"Sir, an Earth Forces mobile armor has broken through the first line of defence and incoming!"

"Ready the rail guns! Aim it at the enemy mobile armor!"

"Enemy's distance at 75. 60. 45. Target has been locked."

"FIRE!"

The purple ship blew up, scattering its remains in space. It was lost in an instant.

Flay gasped for air. Her pupil dilated with terror. She saw that! She saw it! She had seen how that mobile armor blew up into pieces, and how the pilot inside bloated-up following the same fate of the machine, seconds later.

Flay could not speak nor could she move. Flay felt as though something inside her was falling, falling through earth, leaving her forever.

It was like sinking into an old nightmare; for an instant, a re-enactment of her watching helplessly as her father's escort ship blew up in the mist of the battlefield, but in reality she was staring, watching ZAFT against Earth Forces of people whom she does not know, eliminating each other in order to survive.

When there came another explosion, Flay screamed at the top of her lungs causing everybody at the bridge to stop at what they were doing for a few second, and looked at the distraught, haggard woman in shock. She was clutching her face shut, tears dripping through the same hands, shaking in fear as she staggered backwards floating in zero gravity.

No one really paid her any attention though. It was the commander behind Flay, who really got them stimulating.

"Commander."

"Commander."

Flay felt a hand on her shoulder. "This, my dear, is the harshness of war." Commander Le Creuset whispered into her ears before taking his pose next to the Captain of the Vesalius, Ades. The Commander yelled out a couple of orders, coordinates, battle strategies, and other military tactic, which Flay did not recognize. When he was done, he held up a hand telling Flay to sit on the space he was pointing to.

It was a special seat located at the upper center of the room. It was supposedly the Commander's chair, Flay guessed since it had this _sardonically_ fabulous view of the bridge and battlefield where nothing at range would be missed.

Flay hesitated for a moment, the previous explosion still lingering in her thoughts, yet she feared what would happen to her if she did not obey the Commander. Hence, she had no choice but to sit.

As the battle went on, there came crossfire, eradication, and explosion after explosion.

The battlefield was full of horrors as seen by Flay. She had always known war would cause death. It was instincts. But never would she have imagined war to be much more horrifying, watching it takes place live. It was maddening.

People dying, whaling, screaming in pain as their life is forfeited in an instant. Those who are lucky manage to escape with only a wound, but as for the others. There were no second chances.

Engaging in battle, the _Nazca_**-**class ship they are on shook immensely. Flay grip tighter onto the armrest. Nausea hitting her, making her chest twisting in awful discomfort.

When an Earth Force Mobile Armor was shot down, she would catch a glimpse of her father's ship all over again. When Zaft Forces Mobile Suit blew up, she unconsciously thought of Kira.

The bridge seemed to fly away, become smaller, shrink, as Flay reeled backward from the scene. She could not breathe. Flay screamed at the top of her lungs. She could not bear to look at any of the other ships, to see who else had died. She did not want to think of her friends sharing the same fate. She no longer wanted to see.

There came another explosion and another.

And unable to withstand fact no longer, Flay turned away and fled out the room. _Father, Kira…_ She yearned not to feel… She wished she could rip out her heart, her innards, everything was screwing inside of her, and she did not slow down until she reached the confinement of the nearest washroom.

Flay's outburst, of course, inside the bridge is like a fly in a windshield. Logically, the intense battlefield was much more important than one girl's sanity, a prisoner's no less. Thus, no one bothered with her.

"Sir, the Enemy Forces are now retreating. Allied Forced are also returning to base." One of the crew finally announced with relief several minutes later.

Captain Ades turned to his Commander, looking distraught. "Commander, what is your intention for that girl?" Generally, it is not customary to bring a Prisoner to bridge. And through experience the Captain knew the Commander always act with a cause.

Le Creuset's silver mask glinted through the light. "Let's just say I've been looking for the key and now I've found it at least I hope so."

"Sir, GAT-X102 Duel has successfully returned to base, sir." The man in the communications controller announced.

"Excellent." Commander Le Creuset began calmly, "Inform Yzak Joule to locate for Ms. Allster and escort her back to her room. Tell him, to report to my quarters only after he has done so. I have other matters to attend to."

"Yes, sir."

And with that the blond Commander left bridge.

00000

_Escort that girl back to her room?_

Yzak gritted his teeth in full annoyance, searching for the Natural Prisoner as ordered by his commandeering officer. _Task like these should not even be associated with him!_ Yzak grunted.

Passing through hall after hall,

_Flush._

Yzak pushed a door aside, revealing a very pale looking girl kneeling in front of the toilet bowl. Seemingly frail, Flay slowly wiped her mouth with her sleeves, apparently, from having recently thrown-up.

Yzak was forced to roll his eyes at the sight. He knew Naturals were inferior, but _this girl_ _is so pathetic._ Even he could not believe it.

00000

The next day came, just a few hours from the previous one. The cold swish of air from the opening of the door whisked a few strands of Flay's red hair in to her face, though she was still able to see on the other side a pair of clear and intense blue eyes glaring down at her.

Fighting the urge to avert her eyes from his, she heard Yzak's stern voice as if he lives to torment her. "Commander Le Creuset has sent for you."

"Just… leave me alone…." Flay muttered, a quarter begging, another quarter annoyed and half scared. Her plead, however, were proven to be futile when Flay found herself being forcefully dragged off from her bed, out of her cabin, and into the ship's infirmary with Commander Le Creuset in front of her while the boy with the scar brought up the rear.

They walked passed speeding stretchers, catching glimpses of injured soldiers after injured soldiers as if touring the vicinity like a museum. It was sick.

If Flay thought the battlefield was horrible, the result of it, she soon found out was much worst and full of gore. There were bleeding wounds, broken limbs, disfigured faces, poking innards, a few disabled. Flay embraced herself protectively, afraid something similar may happen to her.

"Damn those Naturals! They should all just die!" One of the injured yelled.

Nearly at the end of the room, Flay turned around startled, suddenly taking notice of the room in full view where it is packed with injured people, whether they were Naturals or Coordinators it made no difference.

It was a devastating sight. A frozen moment given, given to her for reasons she could not explain.

Flay had recognized the other one on the left to be one of those guys who sometimes brought in her meals. Despite the fact they were according to her _filthy_ Coordinators who deserve it. They were all still human; bleeding blood; crying in pain.

When Flay caught one of the medics plunging knife into skin; steady hands diving into a man's open chest in search for a bullet, Flay felt as if she felt the same pain burning through her own chest.

Flay blue-gray's were wide, dilated with fear, and they seemed to swell, bigger and bigger until she could not look at the sight no longer. Flay's instinctive reaction was to squeeze her eyes shut and squeeze a palm against her chest. She gulped air in shaky and uneven gasps, tremors wracking her body.

Flay could not bear to look at any of the other bodies, to see who else had been badly injured.

She felt a chill up her spine. Her body shook with it, and her breath came hard and fast. She took one stumbling step back, but it seemed as if she has rammed against a wall, and could not turn and run as she so suddenly wanted to do.

"Get a hold on yourself!" She heard Yzak yell as he grabbed hold of her arm. His hand was the only thing holding her up as she was obviously ready to faint away.

With great ease Yzak hustled Flay up, his hand tightening around her arm, making sure she stayed awake. He'll be damned, if he ends-up having to carry the girl back to her quarter.

"War is harsh isn't it? people and life are so fragile yet both sides still insist of eliminating each other." Le Creuset said causing both Yzak and Flay to turn their momentary attention to the Commander, whose face showed no sign of even the slightest recoil.

As the patients' whales of pains continued to fill the room, tears began forming and blurring Flay's vision, but she was unable to blink them away.

"Please make it stop." Flay pleaded unable to take her eyes from the cold grey mask, expressionless, indifferent, with a mirthless smile below. The same face he had addressed her with when he had apologized to her the first time for dragging her all over the place.

'_But orders are orders'_ Flay could recall him saying and knew that pleading was hopeless. There was nothing the Commander could do. And they would be staying in for a couple of more minutes._ Whose orders are these? Whose orders are these anyway?_

The tears flowing more freely down her face now. Flay turned around and threw her herself on whatever it was that was nearest to her and buried her head on it trying to block out the sight. Block out the sound and the distinct smell of blood. It was hard and it was not comfort, but it would have to do.

Yzak too advert his gaze away from the sight. With all the blood, the cursing and whaling, watching people in pain was not exactly in his list of favorite things to do. If it were up to him he would not even be in here. Visiting an injured friend or family was one thing but this, this was _sight seeing_! But what choice does he have? Coming to the infirmary was the Commander's idea and what else could he do but act on it.

00000

Flay was wide-eye, terrified, gasping for air as she lay alone in her room. She had collapsed into the bed right after stripping off that _filthy _ZAFT. No. Coordinator's uniform which now lay crumpled on the floor by the bedside. Her tears have dried up completely, leaving her without even the energy to sob anymore.

Lost in the unworldly neon blue lighting, the walls in her room are lined with red everywhere she turned. People screaming. Images of people dying. Her father's shuttle exploding. Kira disappearing. The glares of strangers bouncing off her. She felt trapped. The hallucinations drenched her brain like sheer poison. Her life was an illusive nightmare. She did not want this, yet she could not make the visions stop.

When people pass through her door, she would stopped abruptly, holding her breath until her lungs were ready to explode; afraid they would hear and drag her back into watching those horrid images of war.

She could not even pay any attention to the food that has been growing cold next to her on table. Like all the other days, she refused to eat, let alone touch it.

_This was her punishment. _Flay thought invitingly. She was guilty- _For underestimating the intensity of war. _Guilty for dragging Sai and his friends back into it, simply out of her cruel intention for Kira.

Her small body shook with the vestiges of tremors. Carefully, Flay opened her blue-gray eyes, which are reddened by tears, only to find she was alone.

Silence finally.

Flay curled in bed, cherishing the fraction of a moment.

Then, it started happening again.

Faster and faster. Her breath became uneven as macabre thoughts whirled in her head. Fear stabbed at her insides, twisting, contorting her chest muscles. Flay urged trying to make it to the bathroom. Her hand reaching for the open button; she slid behind the door and sealed it tightly behind her and threw up- emptying the last content of her already empty stomach.

Flay crawled to the corner of the bathroom afterwards with her back against a window. She wrapped quivering arms around her knees and buried her head.

They are at space. Flay knew that there was no escape. There was no way out. There was nowhere for her to return… Return to where, to who exactly? Her father's gone. Sai no longer cares for her. Kira died in battle just as she had wanted him to. Similar to Pro and Post war, she no longer has any place to return to. There is nothing left for her in life anymore.

Derange, Flay's lips curved maniacally after catching a glimpse of reflecting light glimmering across the tiny room and decided to stride over. Flay was staring at the medicine cabinet with great interest. Not the cabinet as a whole but at the mirror in front of it.

She did not think of what she did to complete the deed, for her life had been over and only one last act was needed. Smashing the glass, she took the jagged base on which she had cut herself, seeing nothing but her own pale face and wooly blue-gray eyes reflected back her and went to the window.

"_You are already living on borrowed time, aren't you, Flay Allster?"_

Commander Le Crueset was right… She should have been long dead.

The thirst for her own blood burned in her throat, seemed to feed her with impossible strength.

Dimly, Flay heard someone call out her name—in her mind, in her ears. She blocked it out.

Flay wanted nothing—nothing so much more as the glory of running the pointy blade through her skin, and the feeling, the power sings through her at that murderous stroke. It coursed through her, a little deeper, a little truer every minute._ Closer,_ she thought, _so much closer_. She could feel the promise of it – dark, bitter, seductive. It was like sex.

When the glass cut through her wrist and blood fell at her feet, Flay felt the trill of it. Flay then cut the other wrist and leaned back against the wall, one wrist on her lap, the other on the floor, her blood sipping through the mortar and tiles. She looked at the blood flowing from her body with a sense of relief.

_It was a beautiful day when her father decided to take her to the park one festive evening. He had purposely nipped the rest of his day just to share a little bit of father and daughter time, and they had explored the festivity together hand-in-hand for the rest of the night. She could still recall the taste of sweet cotton candy in her mouth, which her father had bought for her from a nearby stall. She could still clearly recall the bright lights and the beautiful fireworks setting off through the night sky as if all had just happened yesterday. _

"_No matter what happens, promise me, you'll stay strong for daddy, okay?" Her mother had past away a year by then, but her father's smile remained so kind, so warm and gentle as if mother had never disappeared. _

_Little Flay looked up at her father. She opened her mouth and closed it. Her head nodding up and down, _but the only words she heard formed in her lips were _"I'm sorry…"_

Gradually, Flay thoughts became lazier. It was almost as if she went to sleep. And everything in her vision came to a blur.

Someone running in; his mouth moving in a fanatic pace. And as her chin tilted upward a little bit higher, Flay felt a tear drop escaped her while looking into lovely blue warm worried eyes, which reminds her so much of how Kira used to look at her.

_Kira, could this be death's hands?_

As a pair of arms lift her up, Flay closed her eyes and thought no more.

00000

Yzak could not be even more furious. _So this was he was reduced to— somewhat like a delivery boy. When Commander Rau Le Crueset orders, Yzak Joule delivers._ And recently, the Commander's orders have been nothing more than for Yzak to fetch the prisoner of war for him more and more frequently.

Recently, reaching the prisoner's apartment, Yzak halted in front of the door.

Yzak pressed the call button; "I'm coming in!" he hollered and went in unbothered to wait for the Natural's reply. This, after all, was not the first time Flay had been bothered not to answer him. But who was she to tell him what to do?

When Yzak entered the prisoner's room, he found it vacant. Thus, he went straight for her bathroom. _Lock_. He taught.

"Hey, the Commander has asked for you!" Yzak said then waited. There was no answer from her.

Yzak folded his arms, tapping his foot furiously. His gazed traveled along the typical room; his eyes setting on a familiar untouched food tray left on the table to the green military uniform abandoned at the foot of the bed. Yzak rolled his eyes. _That girl is taking forever._ His patience was already running thin, assuming that it wasn't even _thick_ to begin with.

And then—he heard something smash inside the bathroom_, a _distinct sound of glass shattering on the floor.

Greatly alarmed, Yzak furiously pounded on the door. "Hey, what is going on in there?" He shouted from his side, ordering Flay to unlock the _damn_ door. It did not happen nor did she take the time to answer him. "I said, open the _damn_ door!" Yzak pound harder. The door unfortunately did not even quiver. Yzak was so engrossed in anger that he could think of wanting nothing more than to kick the door down, but that would be pointless. It was made of steel- hard cold, thick steel as the rest of the ship.

Searching for other alternatives, his quick eyes landed on an adjacent handle. Wasting no precious time, he pulled the thing out, revealing a miniature computer and with it- started hacking into the system.

Task done, the door finally flew open. And to Yzak's horror, all he saw was red. Blood. There was so much of it.

There was blood on the toilet. Blood on the sink. Blood on the tiles. Blood on the girl's bloody wrist! The color was draining Yzak's face as though he had suffered from a mortal wound. His eyes dilated with terror. This scene felt like a nightmare. It was like he was losing a comrade all over again. Yzak acted fast. _Damn it!_ He cursed, roughly pulling out towels and dabbing her wrists clean. _No more deaths! _He pressed the fabric firmly in place, trying to prevent more blood from escaping.

And then, in one swift motion Yzak easily lifted Flay up on his arms. She was frail and awfully light; he growled at the fact, wondering when was the last time this girl had last eaten as he urgently run her to the infirmary.

Yzak did not understand what had just happened back there. He did not know why he suddenly felt the way he did. He had seen countless people die, countless dead bodies, yet he could not let a measly scared Natural girl's, a prisoner nonetheless, near death experience pass through him.

Didn't he want her gone? Her death would only result to having one less person to care about. Logically, no one abroad other than the Commander probably would miss her if she committed suicide. She was ZAFT's prisoner, after all. They have no use to her from the very beginning.

So why? Why did this girl's near suicide incident affected him so much?

Flay's blood was already cold on his fingers as Yzak sat there on the edge, without a word, watching Flay's medical treatment take place. Even until now, he could not get himself to leave the vicinity without knowing she would be fine. In half a shake, Yzak knew as a fact that something was terribly wrong with him.

Flay was apparently very much awake by now as she was struggling and screaming against three medical staffer, who were wrestling her to not move too much on bed.

"Let go of me! Let me die! I want to die!" Flay screamed again and again, "I can't take this anymore! You- Coordinators killed my father! Why not just kill me too!" the sound went through Yzak like physical pain.

Dearka had once asked him- what will he do if ever they were about to be captured by the Enemy Forces? Obviously, he had answered Dearka so surely of himself that he would have chosen death. He would take his own life than to let it happen.

So was it a mistake- saving an enemy prisoner from killing herself?

Yzak was angrily confused. Apparently, ever since Commander Le Creuset had brought Flay Allster abroad the ship and treated her so well, nothing made sense anymore.

Flay's screams of "I want to die!" echoed around the small vicinity.

Yzak pressed both his hands together in a tight squeeze. For a moment, he saw himself in her place. If he were in her shoes, would he not do the same by taking his own life? So why-? Why does watching this Natural prisoner struggling to die make him so angry?

There on a nearby bed was a Natural so pathetic, weak and useless, trying to commit suicide. From what he had witness the last few days, Flay apparently has never been in assigned to the frontline. _What kind of soldier would scream like the way she did on the battlefield and throw-up afterward?_ The way Flay's hands trembled while holding a gun clearly indicated that she has never in her life, _actually_ shot another man before_. _And her hands were so obviously never been soaked with blood. Now, that he thought about it… For a soldier, this girl was acting like a damn terrified civilian.

And then his thought flew over to Dearka, Rusty, Miguel, and Nicol, who all volunteer in the military, fought so hard to care for what they love, yet all lost their life in battle trying to protect PLANTs, their home and everyone in it.

Again, Flay's high-pitched voiced bounced off the wall.

At that moment, something within Yzak snapped. God knows what had made him stood up from that corner, but Yzak knew he was dead furious. _Flay Allster is an insult to soldiers all around, especially to those who had lose their lives, fighting._

Before anyone could comprehend what the young Red was about to do, Yzak slapped Flay across the face; the blow echoed around the room. Flay's head snapped to the side at the impact. It wasn't a hard slap, but it was something she hadn't been expecting. Something she wasn't even sure had actually happened until the burning spread through her cheek.

This was actually the first time aboard this ship did Flay realized that she has taken full notice of something else other than fear. Anger, disgust, hurt, depression. Yzak's face was coiled with all of it.

"You are an insult to soldiers everywhere! Disregarding your own life while others fought hard to preserve it! If you want to die so bad; go die in the battlefield!" Yzak said, and the rest looked startled.

Yzak heard the authority in his own voice, the conviction, the sense of purpose that had come to him as the day he decided to enlist in ZAFT. All of their faces were turned toward him, looking puzzled.

"I'm leaving," Yzak told no one, looking down his hands still covered in Flay's blood. His voice broke on the last word and left.

00000

It was about an hour and a half later when the Commander Le Creuset decided to pay a little visit into the infirmary.

Behind a large white curtain, the medic in charge shook his head refusing to let the Commander see Flay in private. The girl was unstable. He had experience it first hand. The Natural had struggled to take her own life during treatment not so long ago, and the girl also went as far as attempt to stab one of his crew members with a surgical knife just to achieve it.

However, when the Commander insisted on checking-up Flay alone. Orders are orders, the medic was forced to leave his station.

"How are you, my dear?" Le Creuset asked Flay, momentarily after, he pulled the curtain to Flay's division open and he stepped in, gently, not wanting to frighten the shaken patient. "I am sorry to take you out of bed," added Le Creuset, "my crew did not harm you, did they?" He was clutching onto a chair, and lures a strange look: half truculent, half intrigued. He softened the tone of his voice taking advantage of what Flay had once referred to as her daddy's voice just as he took notice of her red stricken cheek.

The news of Flay Allster trying to commit suicide and Yzak Joule slapping her of course had already reached him.

Preserving the silence of the room, Flay stayed indifferent and said nothing. And for the first time, Flay did not tremble in front of the Commander. Instead, she simply sat on her bed; silently staring at the bandaged cuffed around her wrists.

The girl, apparently, has calmed and was unnecessary to be strapped down. Le Creuset could only smirk at this surprising sight and at the sudden change.

As Commander of the Vesalius and an observant person, Le Creuset knew many things. He had been obviously aware from the very beginning that Flay Allster has been completely ignorant of war, and she was no soldier. He knew how his crew questions his intention for Flay Allster out of earshot. Le Creuset knew a lot of things. And he took pride of being the only one who has the answer on how to end the war. Not that he brags about it.

Rau Le Creuset thought of himself as a strategist. War was like chess and he is God. In order to win battles, one must move accordingly while predicting the opponent's next move. The trill of the game, of course, was having the power to manipulate the entire game as neither black nor white was aware that both of them are simply a pawn of an even bigger game played by God himself.

But what a surprise. Commander Rau Le Creuset had never expected that the sadness and depression Flay would be facing would be this extreme. He knew she was depressed. He needed her to be weak. He needed her to trust him; depend on him; to able to easily bend her to his will, and most of all he needed her to want to help him end the war. Except, never had he imagined she would drop so low to the point of suicidal.

If she was any other soldier, he would not have cared. But Flay Allster was important. As to what he have recently found out, Flay was the daughter of the late Vice Foreign Minister of Atlantic Federation, George Allster. Certainly, the Earth Forces would take Flay Allster back if she were to be given back to them freely. And together with her would be his little present.

For a brief moment, he had almost feared that he may had lost a valuable key piece to his game. It was like going through a quick turn of unexpected events. But all was well now, fortunately, this girl may still have some use to him.

"Could you…" Flay began almost in whispers. "Tell me about him?"

"Him?" Le Creuset asked curiously. He had no idea who or what Flay was talking about.

Flay nodded still with her head bowed low, "the boy with the scar." She said softly, her eyes staring at her treated wounds that would leave scars on her wrist, which reminded her so much of his. The scar which shown red against his pale skin. It shows that he have experienced pain, and lost if not on the inside, then most definitely on the outside.

00000

Yzak walked into the little corridor, to the basin beneath a window overlooking space. As he washed, again following the train of thought that had come to him in the infirmary.

Yzak understood and yet did not understand. His instincts was telling him one thing, his brain quite another. _Damn._

Yzak stood quite still, eyes glazed, watching the other ships float gradually at rest. Then he looked down at his clean hands, and was momentarily surprised to see the cloth he was momentary holding in them. He set it down and return to the Waiting Room as he did so well. And there flashed across his mind, shift as the reflection of his scar on mirror, the outline of wound he knew extremely well.

The room loomed over Yzak, and he stared at it, feeling so utterly alone and small he could do nothing but appraise this bulking monstrosity of a room that now only he attends to. _There's the chair. There's the table. There's Dearka's magazine. There's Nicol's music sheets_. Yzak thought how this small vicinity used to be bursting with life where he, Dearka, Nicol, Athrun, Rusty and even Miguel used to stay in while eagerly waiting for the team to be assigned with their first mission as the Le Creuset team; never pondering, never imagining, never expecting the day that they might end up the way they are now.

Yzak replayed scenes in his head. Always. Always. Brooding on and about how he could have not been able to save them. If he had been able to destroy the Strike in the first place, then his comrades might never have died.

The image of Nicol, Rusty, and Miguel's death as well as Dearka's MIA forced its way back into his mind's eyes… and for a moment, he could not breathe. Death was impatient.

But after what have happened to Junius Seven, who could just sit back and do nothing?

Dearka, Rusty, Miguel, Nicol, Athrun, and he… All of them knew since the first day they decided to join the military means they are willing to give-up their lives for the safety of PLANTs.

One by one, they lost their life alright. Them ZAFT's top graduates. Imagine that! This was all thanks to that _damn_ Strike and that Archangel, which refuses to go down! So what good was it that his comrades lost their lives? Their deaths have been in vain because everyone with brains should know PLANTs was still far from being safe!

Yzak looked slightly sick, and suddenly trembling in his anger and the intensity of his pain. He kicked the table next to him causing the stuff on top to fly. Yzak's face was wet with tears. He felt nothing but revulsion. He wished those never happened; wished he could wash his mind clean of it.

Everyone associated with him seems to be either prone to injury aka Athrun, who has been reassigned, or have this tendency of losing their life, which refers to the rest of the former Le Creuset squad! Furthermore, in addition to this theory was that Natural girl's recent suicide attempt!

Over and over as trained solders they were reminded that crying over the past would not solve anything. Yzak knew this, but his heart could not accept it. It would be unlike him to say that he cared for his comrades, but in reality he really does despite him expressing it or not. He held back on the tears for as long as he could. It was, however, inevitable.

_Athrun better not die. He'll see to him personally if he does anything stupid._

Yzak slammed a clenching fist into the wall hard causing a staff that happened to be in the same hallway to jolt and turn away quickly, removing himself from the immediate vicinity.

Yzak knew death in the battlefield was unavoidable, but… No one- no one was going to die a pointless death under his watch again! He would not allow it. Not if he could help it!

* * *

**A/N: **And that's the author's little insight on: why Yzak Joule shielded Cagalli Yula Athha out in the battlefield. Lol. I don't know if this chapter is any good though… I was hoping it to be gory but oh well.

P.S. Sorry if my grammar is not very good.


	4. Admiration

**Hero: Chapter 4: "Admiration"**

* * *

News of Siegel Clyne's treachery and Clyne Faction's deflection have already circulated the Media. Siegel Clyne has been killed in military action while Lacus' now on the run.

Commander Le Creuset decided to switch off the television, in the middle of an on going broadcast, completely unimpressed. "The chairman is having a rather hazardous time to bringing Lacus Clyne under control. Through I don't imagine that's the reason behind his orders to call as back."

Standing on the sideline, Flay said nothing. She did not dare speak her mind for she feared she might get in trouble for it. Her gaze then secretly traveled to Yzak.

Yzak however, who was in the same room begs to differ, "I'm still having a hard time to believe it. I just can't imagine her as a traitor" said Yzak. He had always been a fan of her music. And he has always believed Lacus Clyne to be a good person.

"Clyne's followers are using her for that exact reason. Her fans believe she could do no wrong, but your not as gullible as to believe that now, are you? War is really about the conflicting ideas of different people." The Commander explained. "What is it really that we should be fighting against? Never lose sight of that."

00000

Time seems irrelevant when fighting in war. It was only nineteen hundred hours then, but half of the ship were already asleep. The commander had mentioned that it was protocol. The crew takes turn watching the ship, so everyone would not be too exhausted for battle.

"An attack could happen at anytime." The Commander told her and suggested her to rest as well. But despite Commander Le Creuset's kind proposal, Flay found herself unable to fall asleep, and simply lay there on her back looking up at her bedroom ceiling.

_It has been awhile._

The grief that had possessed her since her father and Kira's death felt different now. The accusations she had on Coordinators seemed to have nested in her brain like a diseased thing, infecting her memories, that it did not seem as horrifying anymore.

Coordinators. Flay did not like them, but it seems she could no longer find herself blaming every little thing on them to any further extent. It was a strange feeling, somewhat similar to growing out of an old habit.

_Buzz. _

Flay's hazy gaze automatically flew to the door.

"You better not be asleep!" Yzak's fierce voice rang through the intercommunication device before entering the room with Flay's dinner, routinely for the last couple of days.

Apparently, since the suicide incident, Yzak Joule had made it his obligation to bring her meals to her, day after day, and made sure she ate.

He never explained himself, but he never fails to check up on her every three to five hours; to search her room for any trail of blood, reopened wound or anything sharp that she could use to harm herself.

Flay figured, this was his way of displaying extra precaution in case she decides to try and take her own life again. An unnecessary act, for she no longer wishes for death.

Yzak set the food tray on a nearby table then glared at Flay.

"Get off the bed!" He ordered causing Flay to scramble away from the furniture, giving him the space to rustle through the mattress and blanket. Once done, Yzak automatically turned toward the drawers, the clean bathroom, and lastly to Flay herself. He patted her from top to bottom, in case she was concealing something that can be felt as unusual through her clothes.

When the search was done, Yzak would simply move to the side; lean on a wall and cross his arms, looking like what he usually does which was annoyed.

"Hurry up and eat. I don't have all day!" Yzak commanded. He always managed to sound like she was a burden to him. And his harsh tone pushed Flay into hurrying to the table.

Yzak was never gentle. All he ever does was raise his voice at her; despite the fact she no longer fought against him. He was nothing like Kira, Flay thought. But no matter, how long she took and how Yzak was always rushing her to act quicker, Flay had noticed, Yzak never had any intention of leaving her alone until she was completely done with her meal.

Quietly, Yzak watched Flay as she scooped a spoon full of rice and ate without interruptions. When Flay had finished eating, she pushed the tray away gradually.

"I'm done." She said.

Yzak simply stared at her with no change of expression.

They barely spoke a word to each other; never have been engrossed on a decent conversation, but seeing how he had watched her like a hawk everyday had indicated-, Flay knew- that somehow he cared.

As Yzak was about to leave with the empty tray,

"Ah." Flay gasped; resulting Yzak to pause at the door, for a fracture of a moment. "Thank you." She said in whisper. She did not have the courage say it to him properly, but she wanted to.

Yzak turned around and left, only one word summarized his thoughts. And it wasn't even a word. "Hmph."

00000

_"Lacus Clyne's wish for peace has left her open to others' influence but we understand what is really happening here and that is why we want to save her. We need to free her from the grasp of evil Naturals who are deceiving her. So, for those who love her, we ask that you provide us with any information you have"_

Ezalia Joule's speech ran all throughout PLANTs.

Same time, at a local bar, a blond in full black took a seat near the counter, next to a wine drinking man wearing a dark blue coat.

Arbiter-ing the media, "so finally, it has come down to this. How interesting..." The blond suggested to no one in particular, but in effort to catch the attention of the man seating next to him.

The man in blue shifted his attention from the overhead television to the mysterious man in black, and spoke to him about the world's current state in strange metaphors.

While no other person was paying any attention to them, the blond then replied with a few of his own.

Confirmation made.

The man in blue took this as the password and fleetingly slips a small rectangular disk onto the table. The blond took the disk and went on his way.

00000

_A new mobile suit?_

Yzak looked up at the new machine that had been recently brought into the hanger. "Is this the new guAIZ model?" He asked to whoever was maintaining the machine at the moment.

"Ah. Yes." The mechanic in charge turned around and answered after noticing Yzak there. "It's MMI's newest main force model. This model is being deployed more and more often these days. Sooner or later, we will be able to wipe out the Naturals with these."

Yzak cringed at the man's choice of words. _Wipe out the Naturals?_ At first, Yzak never saw any problem with the idea, but, now, after all he'd been through, this seems to have turned into a complex-ing issue.

As part of ZAFT's military, his duty was to eliminate the Earth Forces that tries to oppress them. And yet, here he was taking care of one them, a Natural. If Naturals were anything like Flay, Yzak thought. Then, in due time, the war would be ZAFT's.

If not only for their vast numbers, ZAFT would have easily taken them out. The Earth Forces, thought Yzak, like Flay were weak, sluggish and impotent in the battlefield.

Despite the effort being futile, Flay had fought off every Coordinator aboard the ship, including the Commander, like crazy at first. However, for the last few days, Yzak had noticed how Flay had surprisingly mellowed down in their presence. She had even strangely thanked him for acting like a jerk.

_Was this similar to surrendering?_ Yzak wondered.

Back on earth, he had witness his own kind shoot down Naturals who had waved the white flag at their army. True, they need no hostages, but what was the point of shooting unmoving targets? Yzak balled his hand into a tight fist, confusedly and frustrated. _What the hell, was he really suppose to be doing?_

"I'll leave that to you!" The mechanic incited before realizing Yzak was no longer there listening to him.

00000

"This is the predicted course of Eternal, which has been calculated from Yakin Due's pursuit data." Commander Le Creuset explained, showing the crew a diagram.

"The L4 Colony Cluster? Just as I thought..." This time it was Captain Ades. "This sure has become awkward. Suspicious people made it their hideout before and now it is being used like this."

"I believe that Clyne's group's plan is not that grand, but... 'We don't like war...' is it? It looks like it's pretty divided, even within the military. Don't you have a feeling that something might pop out?" The commander suggested.

"I have had a chance to meet Captain Waltfeld. But who would have thought he would do that..." Captain Ades was speaking about the former ZAFT Commander, who also left their side to assist Clyne Faction.

"He is a man with a sharp tongue. Even Chairman Zala took a hit while sitting on his seat. He is a miraculously revived hero, after all."

"Now we are ordered to suppress them."

"It can not be helped. The world is not something that goes by whatever you had planned in your mind before. The treachery hidden within a person is not something that can easily be seen. Never mind understanding where your heart really lies or the thoughts hidden there. Yzak, from now on Athrun is your enemy." The Commander declared causing Yzak to look up at his Commander in partial disbelief. "Can you shoot him down?" The Commander asked.

This was shocking news to ZAFT, especially to Yzak.

Flay too keened up after recognizing the name, and at what Yzak was being expected to do.

_Athrun Zala._

She could remember the Commander telling her this person happens to be another fellow Red coat officer and a former member of the Le Creuset team, who had been reassigned. This person was noted to have been assigned on a special mission by the council, but has returned to PLANTs with his ideals turned about. He had also refused to reveal the location of two of ZAFT's special mobile suits, which automatically brands him as a traitor to PLANT's military.

Flay's attentive gaze fell to Yzak as to everyone in the room. At the same time, Flay could not help but feel sympathetic towards him. She could recall- Kira had to go through the same situation. He was forced to choose between protecting his friends and siding with his own kind. A choice which had completely tore Kira emotionally apart. A choice that she _somewhat_ decided for him and now partially regretted.

_Which is it going to be?_

Flay was kind of surprised by her sudden interest in what Yzak would do in such a situation. She had noticed- how he looked at the diagram in front of them. His forehead scrunched up in this distressed way that made him look like he really had to think about what he was going to say.

And his answer, to everyone's astonishment was bold, precise and of no hesitance. Even Flay was completely taken aback by Yzak's decision. He had looked at everyone with assurance. His eyes were clear of any trace of doubt. And his words did not even falter.

One by one, if not dead, everyone he trusts seems to be turning against him. It must have really hurt.

"Yes sir, like I would any traitor!"

Yzak was part of the military and so was everyone else aboard the Vesalius.

It was rather hard to explain- to be able to stick to the cause of the military no matter what the circumstances were… even to go as far as point a gun at someone- whom you had once worked so closely with. How could anyone casually decide on something as significant as that after having already lost so much? For someone to be able... must have taken a great amount of fortitude.

"What are you looking at?" Yzak snapped at Flay.

Flay, who had not notice she was staring, said nothing and turned her gaze away.

00000

_ALERT! ALERT!_

Once again, the entire ship flashed red. The sirens all around blared like mad, intending to wake up the soldiers who were resting.

_Condition Red! Condition Red!_ The speakers repeated, motioning its crew to quickly switch into battle formation. And by this time, Flay did not have to be told. Despite the fact that she did not have a distinct position inside the Vesalius, Flay hurriedly kicked herself off bed anyway. She quickly put on her uniform and pulled on her boots before racing out from her room as quick as she could.

_"Yzak Joule. Duel. Launching!" _

Upon entering the bridge, Flay managed to catch a glimpse of Yzak's blue and white mobile Suit being propelled into space.

Momentarily after catching her breath, Flay stepped forward approaching the center to get a better view of the crossfire.

"Having you around the bridge has become a regular sight, my dear." The commander smiled at the fact of Flay was, bit by bit, trying to find more ways to be helpful.

The commander had noticed this side of her when Flay started showing up more frequently on bridge during battles. And it was during these times that she would take the opportunity to quietly watch, no, observe how the crew operated the systems.

While other times, she would even leave the security of her own room to bring him his lunch straight from the cafeteria.

Actually, Commander Le Creuset was quite impressed at her change of attitude. Then again, maybe he already had figure out how this change was possible. The Commander took a quick glance at the girl's back from his seat. He was completely obvious to how she was intensely watching the battlefield as if in search for something specific.

_It is a shame though,_ thought Le Creuset. He would not be able to see her grow up any further. For he knew, Flay would be parting them soon. And this war was about to come to its end. The commander smirked, squeezing a miniature disk on the palm of his hand.

_Yes, Flay will definitely be of use to him._

Flay watched the battlefield from left to right then right to left. Searching... Searching... hoping to catch even the smallest dash of dynamic white and blue amongst the many flashes of color in chaos.

_Yzak will be fine._ Flay found herself hoping._ Because he always comes back._

She had been watching him for several days, simply, because she looked up to him.

She recognized his arrogance, his easy grace, which looks as if he was out to conquer the world. No matter that he had fought on the losing or winning side, he carried himself with pride.

He would pick himself up after every fall; tackling one obstacle after another head on. Yzak was simply a guy who never gives-up.

And by watching him... This strength of his... Flay felt a fire within herself. That is hope.


	5. Turning

**Hero: Chapter 5: "Turning"**

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* * *

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"Well, well, what do we have here... it seems the curtain has been raised on this little show." The commander said, studying through another set of diagram with Captain Ades and Yzak.

"... The eternal and two other ships, sir. One of them is the legged ship. And the earth forces are attacking with one ship." Captain Ades announced.

There came a momentary pause as the Commander thought and analyzed the situation at hand. He leaned on his elbow, crossing his fingers of both hands.

"Until we have a better understanding of the situation, we are better off staying out of it. Yzak and I are to head out together into the colony. We will gather information."

"You are going personal Commander?" the Captain said in surprise. In situations like this, normally, it would be more practical to send out privates or lower ranking officers to gather information. Being their Commander, Commander Rau Le Creuset was not only overqualified for the task, but also too important to put at risk. But apparently the Commander had other plans.

"I want the Visinger and Helldarling to stay here." Commander Le Creuset stood up from his seat. "The Mendel colony." He added, amusedly thinking. "If we dig enough, we could bring a number of matters into a close." He then turned his attention to the Captain again. "Are my orders clear?"

"Sir." The Captain saluted.

00000

_What is the Commander thinking?_

_If this was about gathering information then wouldn't he, plus some other private be enough for the mission?_ Yzak scowled. _Sending out the Commander is just preposterous! He should have said something!_

However, Yzak knew better than to question his superiors. It was a sign of disrespect and the strict military discipline that he learned in the academy and in the Joule household refrain him from doing so. _Curse his ethics and principles!_

"Are you ready, Yzak?" The commander asked, contacting him trough an intercommunication device from a separate cockpit as they readied.

"Sir." Yzak confirmed. _Captain Ades should have said something!_

"Let's go." The commander launched, closely followed by Yzak, and the two headed off on their way to the Mendel Colony.

Commander Le Creuset's Unit was on front while the Duel brought the rear. Yzak looked around the Colony that was left in ruins. Falling buildings, dusk filled atmosphere. There was nothing much to see.

"They are coming!" Commander Le Creuset warned all of the sudden even before his radar could pick up signs of the two incoming mobile suits.

Yzak looked at the first one on his screen causing his brow to narrow. "Strike..." _As expected from those Archangels nosy bodies._ Yzak then turned to the second one completely shock with outrage. "Buster?"

GAT-X103 Buster. There was no doubt that it was Dearka's Unit.

_Dearka..._

Yzak felt an unsolicited pain within his chest as his late comrade's image popped into his head. Dearka Elsman. He was... a complete dumbass. The only guy who managed to find gratification in his fiasco with Athrun. The blond, although not exactly the most pleasing guy in the army, happens to be his closest friend!

Also the only Red officer who was clarified as MIA by ZAFT military.

_Damn it!_

Yzak have never felt so insulted. _How could Dearka lose to a bunch of Naturals?_

As the Commander took on the Strike not far from them, Yzak could think nothing other than wanting to eliminate the bastard who took his comrade's life and Mobile Suit. Filled with anger, on impulse, Yzak fired rapid shots at GAT-X103 Buster who dodged them skillfully.

"Damn you!" he screamed, pulling out a beam saber to charged at it_. "How dare you use Dearka's unit!"_ Yzak swung his sword, attempting to cut the dynamic machine in half.

In failed attempts to catch the mobile suit, Yzak who was determined to bring it down, fired missile pods at it. The missiles forced the Buster to shoot its beam rifle to protect itself. And the impact between the firearms caused an interval explosion amidst the two of them.

It was at that moment the current pilot of the Buster took the intuitive to speak up.

"Yzak!" The guy called.

The second he heard the familiar voice, out of surprise, Yzak halted from any further assault.

"Dearka?" _could it be?_ "Dearka... Is it really you in there?"

"Yeah, it's me."

In knowing this, Yzak gritted his teeth. He did not know whether to be glad or furious about this sudden realization. "Why the hell are you fighting along side the strike? What the hell is going on here?" Yzak demanded, seriously wanting answers.

The Strike was an enemy Mobile Suit. And for Dearka to be fighting along side it would make him a- a-... Yzak did not want to think it.

"I mean, I am really glad you are alive but I cannot forgive you if this is what it looks like!"

"Yzak..."

"Dearka!" A third party interrupted the communication.

"Kira!" Dearka called, after noticing the Strike Freedom hastening towards their direction ready to assist the Buster in battle.

Yzak apparently saw it too.

"That is-..." Yzak's eyes grew wide. He clearly remembers the machine as the one that saved- trashed his unit in Alaska. Yzak pulled out his beam saber ready to strike. He would not allow the same mistake back in Alaska to happen a second time!

_Freedom incoming on- 3...2...1..._

Dearka flew in between them, preventing a fight.

"Stop, Yzak! You too, Kira!" Both were forced to halt action. "Leave this guy to me." Dearka reasoned to the Strike Freedom.

"Will you be, okay?" The pilot asked, wanting to make sure.

"Yeah." Dearka answered.

Yzak was in the brink of confusion, watching the two exchanged conversation.

_Dearka is alive and is still the pilot of Buster-, who is now fighting along side Strike-, a military threat, who killed Miguel and Nicol! And now this new mobile suit comes along, swooping down from the sky and Dearka knows the Pilot too!_ To Yzak, war was starting to turn into a wild roller coaster ride. _What the hell is going on here?_

"Understood..." The pilot of Strike Freedom confirmed. "But, please, don't do things that Athrun and I have done." And with that, the Freedom flew away.

"Athrun?" Yzak repeated, after hearing the guy's name. _The hell... Athrun is involved too?_

Dearka landed and opened his cockpit. "Let's put our weapons down and talk, Yzak..." He said sounding sincere.

Going along with his former teammate's odd request, Yzak landed his mobile suit in front of the other. Then both pilots jumped out from their machines.

Still acknowledging Yzak as his comrade, Dearka came out and stood in front of his best friend, completely unarmed. Thus, when Yzak pointed a gun at him... Dearka had been clearly shock.

"Do I look like I'll listen to my enemies comfortably?" Yzak explained himself.

"Am I your enemy?" Dearka distressed.

"You became my enemy!" Yzak pointed out.

"I don't' remember becoming your enemy."

"Shut up! You are a traitor!" Yzak said. It was hard for him to accept this, but he had to. What Dearka had done was fact!

"I haven't betrayed PLANTs either!"

"What did you say?" Yzak held his stance, gripping the gun tighter within his fist. _What the hell was Dearka getting at_? Of course, he betrayed PLANTs. This was a perfect example of deflection! Like what Athrun did!

_Damn. Like what Athrun did!_

"It's just that the Naturals are... I just lost the interest to listen to the military like a lapdog and shoot down any Naturals they want me to shoot down!" Dearka argued.

00000

Meanwhile, back at the Vesalius.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

Enemy Forces were sighted near their location.

"Captain Ades!" The one on the communications controller alerted.

_"Damn..." Captain Ades _checked his wristwatch again. It was getting more and more difficult for ZAFT Military to stay idly hidden when the Earth Forces and two other ships were exchanging crossfire around them. "Where is the Commander? What is happening on the inside?" The captain asked frustrated. None of them have the permission to act until they received further instruction from the Commander.

00000

"Lacus Clyne, Captain Waltfeld, and even Athrun?" Yzak named the people who Dearka mentioned, who have turned sides to join their little group called-the three ship alliance.

"Yeah."

"Why, Dearka? Why?" Yzak still did not drop the gun. He simply could not comprehend-why these people, who he had trusted, would turn their backs so easily against them. Against ZAFT. Against PLANTS.

"The Freedom pilot is the one who used to pilot the strike. He's also a Coordinator. And Athrun's childhood friend."

"What!" Dearka had failed to answer his question, but what Dearka had just revealed was shocking news still.

Dearka seems to be deeply thinking... "I don't have as much karma or determination as those two. But I end up seeing things. I've seen their suffering. I was also at Panama, Alaska and Orb. After all that, I can't go back to ZAFT and follow the military's orders anymore."

Without warning, an explosion from afar caused the ground to shake, blowing both Yzak and Dearka off their feet.

"Yzak, can you hear me?" A voice asked urgently through Yzak's communication device. "We are going!" It was the Commander.

In hearing this, Dearka recomposed himself and decided that he should be going as well. The blond turned his back at his former comrade, heading toward his own Unit when Yzak pointed the gun at him again.

The gun was to intimidate him, as Yzak wanted so bad to prevent his best friend from walking away and head towards the biggest mistake of his life.

But Dearka did not stop.

"If you see those that are not ZAFT as enemies then go ahead and shoot me." Dearka said without turning back.

"You are being deceived!" Yzak pleaded.

"I wonder which of us is really being deceived... I don't know but I'm going." Dearka hopped into the Buster and flew away, leaving Yzak alone by himself again.

00000

Catching a glimpse of a limp white thing, making its way out from one of the buildings, "Commander? Commander! Are you-?"

The man was clutching onto his chest, looking like he was in a great amount of pain. Yzak ran to his aid, but Commander Le Creuset waved him off; not allowing the officer to touch him.

"Just hurry and take me back to the Vesalius!" Commander Le Creuset commanded, panting forcefully.

Yzak nodded, quickly rushing to the Duel and hopping on. He turned on the machine with haste and carried the Commander along with his beaten-up mobile suit back to the Vesalius before the Pilot of the Strike and Strike Freedom could return.

Once they were back in the hanger, "Commander!" A worried Yzak quickly jumped off the Duel to check up on his superior, only to surprisingly find the man gone.

00000

_Father..._

_Kira..._

_Archangel... _

Unaware to what was happening outside the small vicinity, Flay sat alone on a sofa looking down at the disk, which she wrapped protected around her slim fingers. She thought of the disk, and the daunting complex mission Commander Le Creuset has left her only a few hours before he departed for something that he had mentioned to be of utmost importance.

Flay closed her eyes and squeezed the palm of her hand, recalling the incident.

Commander Rau Le Creuset had looked extremely exhausted when he had returned to his quarters then.

Flay had watched him with both wonder and concern as the blond commander plop down on his work chair.

_Floating over, "You look exhausted"._

_Aware of Flay's presence, he calmly turned to her "Even I am only human my dear. I live a life from battlefield from battlefield. And I cannot really disagree. If you say it's my own fault for being a soldier and choosing this life but no body is ever born in to this world as a soldier." _

_In hearing this, Flay felt a connection. She unconsciously thought of her friends, everyone. Kira, Sai, Miriallia and so many others who were never soldiers to be begin with. _

_"I would like nothing but to put an end to that... Forever. You agree with me don't you?"_

_Flay thought about what the Commander had just said. It was a nice thought. To be able to revert everything back into how they used to be before the war. She would like that. Everyone including herself could lead a normal life again. She could go back to school with her friends. Where the most complicated problems she would have to face include homework and boys. Except the idea of a blissful life for her seemed like a faraway dream and a tad too late now. Now, that her father was forever gone. _

_Flay simply continued to stare blankly down at the Commanders desk; not saying a word while unconsciously, mirroring her unspoken thoughts and heart through her expressive blue-gray eyes. _

_In noticing this, Commander Le Creuset could only smile. As he had predicted, now would be the perfect time to assign Flay to what he had been long planning for. _

_Gently, he revealed a floating disk at the palm of his hand for Flay to see. "I have the final key in my hands." The disk spun freely yet gradually in zero gravity. "But if the final key stays her then that final door will never open. I wish I could open that door as soon as possible."_

_Bang. _

Flay bolted up noticing the sound that came from outside.

A few seconds later, the door to the Commander Le Creuset's quarter flew open as the said Commander returned.

When the Commander had came rushing back into the room looking completely haggard and mask-less in front of Flay for the first time, Flay thought, he looked nothing like his usual self.

For the first time, Commander Le Creuset was neither calm nor composed. And Flay moved to get closer, partially worried of him until she lost the courage from- witnessing the said Commander desperately digging through his desk drawers, like a mad man, in search for a pack of medicine.

After spotting the sedatives, the commander consumed the pills rather quickly before grabbing a new mask from the drawer which he hurriedly wore.

Paying no attention to anything else, the Commander pressed the call button on his desk.

"Commander, what happened?" a male voice spoke up from the receiver.

Not caring that Flay was there with him, Commander Le Creuset yelled through the speakers. "Get the Vaselius moving, now! Get ready to deploy the Mobile Suits. Have the Visinger and Helldarling do the same!"

"Are you sure?" The man on the other end replied.

_"_Do you think we have come all this way and do nothing! No matter what, we cannot let those Earth Forces get those machines!"

"But sir..."

"I'm going too. Have my Zaku prepared. I will be on the bridge shortly!" And with that, the Commander ended communication. Taking a couple of deep breaths, Rau Le Creuset turned to Flay with a smirk, instantly, after recomposing himself. "I will need your help as well." He told her, "This is my final gamble to see if the door will be opened. I presume you still have the disk?"

Flay froze at the Commander's gaze. "I- I have it..." She said, displaying the small rectangular disk between her quivering hands.

"Good. Come with me." The Commander grabbed Flay roughly by the arm before she was even ready; his grip inflicting pressure against her skin, as he dragged her out and into a changing room located a few halls away.

Flay was told to put on a space suit without question, which she obeyed out of fear. And then she was handed over to the administration of two other men, whom Flay were not familiar with when Commander La Creuset suddenly disappeared,

They took her to the hanger and explained nothing.

Frightened, Flay had watched at a distance as the men readied a small green life pod, made to fit only one person.

Once the pod was ready, one of the two men pushed Flay forward telling her to enter it. And what terrified Flay more was the fact- she was ordered to aboard the thing on her own.

Hesitant to enter, Flay paused outside the open life pod entirely confused of what was going on. _Where is the Commander? Where is Yzak? _Flay was getting real scared being alone with the two of them._ What are these men planning to do with her?_

"Just get in there!" The first guy commanded, leaving Flay to follow-through with the door automatically shutting her in behind her.

Completely terrified, Flay's first initiative was to quickly glance out from one of the two windows available in order to gesture out for possible help.

"What do they got in mind for that girl?" Flay caught a glimpse of the second guy asking the first.

"I don't know. Maybe the Commander had some kind of plan for her." The first guy replied as the two men floated away.

_The Commander..._

Flay paused, then sat down. Suddenly grasping a small idea of why she was there. Alone with nothing else to do, Flay took a deep breath, then quietly took another glance at the disk entrusted to her.

The Commander's voice echoed clearly within her memory_. "I am very tired now. So please deliver this final key for me. If this reaches the Earth Forces, this war will come to an end." _

00000

Currently, at the bridge, with no time to spare, Commander Le Creuset floated over beside Captain Ades and called to open public communication.

_This was his final gamble. _

"Attention the Archangel Class Earth Forces Vessel. Before we commence battle I'd like to return a captive to you." The commander's amplified voice announced, raising a whole lot of eyebrows.

At the hanger, Yzak as well as the rest of the crew there keened up at the Commander's surprising announcement. _Return a captive?_ Yzak pondered for awhile before a realization hit him. _Flay! The Commander can't be serious!_

Back at the bridge, the commander then turned off the communication device and left for the hanger, leaving orders to the release a specific pod as soon as he sorte.

00000

_This must be just one of the Commander's tricks._ Yzak switched on his machine as he readied for launch. _After all, the Commander always has some hidden strategy behind his sleeves. _Yzak entered his code on the Duel's mainframe. _That has to be it!_ _The Commander wouldn't just hand Flay over in such a chaos, would he?_ _Of course, the Commander wouldn't!_ Yzak so wanted to believe.

"The main target is the Eternal!" The commander ordered, suddenly appearing through the screen of his intercommunication device.

"Sir." Yzak complied.

GAT-X102 Duel launched. Followed by ZGMF-X13A Providence. And then as ordered, the Vesalius released a small life pod into the middle of the battlefield.

Feeling his own heart thumping hard, Yzak observed the said pod rather carefully as it spun around in unhinged circles.

From a distance, the pod looked raw, empty, and of no control.

_As expected._ Yzak thought out with a sense of unconscious relief.

If this was indeed a trap planned out by the Commander then it was apparently poorly done. No one would be dumb enough to pick up a strange pod freely given to them by an opposing force.

But then, why should he be concerned about this? _He should not be bothered with useless things like this when he had more important things to take care off._

A couple of orange mobile suit appeared on the Duel's screen. Yzak rushed to bring them down when he was suddenly intercepted by a beam shot from above.

Yzak looked up then glared. "Dearka..."

00000

Flay felt more scared than sick. _What is she supposed to do?_ Flay breathed hard, trying to access SOS through the systems. She had watched how the soldiers operated the Vesalius many times. But at her heighten state, calling for help had proven to be rather difficult. She could not think clearly.

_Please work_. "Archangel!" Flay called, after pressing a couple of buttons, fearing that she might be left there forgotten.

Nothing happened.

Flay desperately tried again, pressing another set of buttons when she screamed, having felt something blow up not so far away. Flay gasped for air. _She did not want to die here! She could not possibly die here! Not when she has the key that could end war... _

Flay panicked, suddenly recalling how her father died. How Kira disappeared. And then her thoughts unconsciously drifted to Yzak and how he would not have given up there.

_She needs to calm down at least... _

Flay shook her head, shaking herself awake_. _And while half shaken, she pressed a new set of buttons again, hoping...

_Please... Please..._

"Archangel!" Flay screamed; her voice successfully amplifying through the battlefield this time.

_It can't be!_ Yzak paused, his attention quickly drifting to the sole life pod, similar to the many other pilots who heard the girl's cry of distress with complete disbelief.

"I beg you Archangel. I'm here!"

Le Creuset smirked behind his mask. _Everything was starting to fall into place._

When Yzak became aware of the ZAFT life pod had Flay in it. Yzak could only watch in complete horror as the girl not meant for war was thrown helplessly back into the bloody battlefield again.

_Why? Why would the Commander-?_ Yzak was lost. _Was it not the Commander who strangely cared for the girl that lead the Vesalius' unusual hospitable treatment to a Prisoner of War? So why would the Commander suddenly just throw Flay into such a risks as surrendering her in the middle of crossfire, where she could easily get killed! _This made no sense at all! _Unless... _Yzak felt as if he had been hit. _Could it be possible that... _Yzak did not want to believe it, but he was really running out of options._ Back then, all this time, could he be the only one who actually cared for her?_

Yzak cringed as Flay's cry for help, once again, echoed through his ears. And he closed his eyes painfully shut, feeling like he had just been stabbed hard in the chest for being unable to do anything about it while the Calamity and Strike Freedom raced to reach Flay's pod first.

_Again... _Yzak shuddered. _He couldn't-even—stop- something like this from happening… _

It was only then did he realize that Flay was nothing more than a scared girl, trying to be brave while forced to grow up too soon and too fast due to the war. She was a lot like him: confused, frightened and insecure, yet too proud and stubborn to admit it.

_'I wonder, which one of us is really being deceived?'_

****End**

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**FACT:** The Vesalius is shot down after this.

Flay realizes that Kira is alive.

**WHY THE TITLE: **"Win. Lose. You will always be a HERO in my eyes." From Flay's point of view. Hero as in someone- you look up to or admire.

**A/N:** Not exactly my best work but I feel accomplished finishing this fiction nonetheless.

Comments and Criticisms would be awesome. Questions regarding the story will be entertained just remember to leave an email so I can get back to you. Thank you for reading the last chapter of "HERO".

And have a Happy New Year!


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